Sugar
I admit it. I have a problem. When someone tells me “Listen, one teaspoon of sugar in your coffee is not going to make any difference” they clearly don't know about the phenomenon of craving.
1 teaspoon is too much and 100 is not enough.
It's not about willpower either. I've got plenty of that!
I've been on many diets, lost hundreds of lbs. (gained them back of course), hiked for miles when I wanted to cry from fatigue, created 30 foot murals in a matter of weeks, driven for miles at dawn to teach art classes...created astonishing meals from scratch....for 60 people. But put a teaspoon of sugar in my coffee in the morning, and I'm off and running for the entire day.
Running on sugar, flour, and all that other white stuff that I can't seem to deny myself.
Long ago I saw a kind of voodoo doctor who looked into my eyes and told me 'NO MORE SUGAR'! I decided he was a nut. Interesting, the ways we can rationalize our behaviors...our addictions. This particular substance especially!
It's not like we'll eat a pile of cookies and go out and crash the car, or a quart of ice cream and wind up living in a cardboard box under a bridge! It's a lesser sin, but it's real, and there's nothing quite so sad as standing in your pajamas at midnight, with the freezer door open, having just one more slice of birthday cake.
I mean, c'mon! It's your birthday!
You've heard of the concept of powerlessness? Well, this defines it (along with martinis, but that's another story). So, I face a battle that I can win for periods at a time, and then eventually will lose, guaranteed. My personal best was a year and a half off the stuff, but then faced with gelato in Venice on my 43rd birthday I succumbed. These days I can go for a few weeks, but seem to find some trivial excuse after a while for just one tiny bite of a newly-baked brownie, and it's curtains.
Fruit I can deal with. It has never set me off, even dried fruit is okay. I can have a handful of raisins and no more. Would anyone ever eat more than a handful of raisins? So, when summer comes along and fruit is at its peak I’m safe...safer...
Strawberry Orange ‘Jam’
10 pitted dates, coarsely chopped
16 oz. good organic strawberries, chopped coarsely
1 cup water
½ cup fresh orange juice
1tablespoon balsamic vinegar
A pinch of salt
In a heavy small pot place dates in water and simmer, stirring and mashing until mixture reduces and you have a paste
Add strawberries and simmer, stirring at intervals until berries begin to break down, about 15 minutes
Add orange juice and continue stirring until mixture thickens and reduces
Let cool for 10 minutes, and add balsamic vinegar and salt
This mixture will continue to thicken as it cools. It's not super-sweet like the jam you're used to, but it's earthy and deep. If you're off bread put some of this stuff in a bowl with a dollop of fresh whole milk ricotta cheese. Who needs ice cream?