Dating Advice
Don't go. This is the best piece of wisdom that I could ever offer anyone. If you're lonely and long for a relationship get a cat (or 2). Let me tell you about the last time I went on a real 'date'.
There was a man who taught at the school I worked at part-time. I hated teaching drawing, because the theory was that anyone could learn to draw, and it's just not true. I would wake up each morning I had a class, and talk to myself on the drive over, saying 'You can do this. It's okay. It'll all be okay. Maybe today will be different.' It was never okay or different and it tortured me to attempt to glean a decent drawing out of the kids. This man taught math there, and he was always cheerful. That should have warned me. Math/cheerful, something has to be wrong. He was tall, and age-appropriate, and we had conversations throughout the day in the hall, where I would go to hide from the kids when I felt I wanted to scream or cry. One day he suggested we have dinner. Really, why not?
I picked a little Thai place around the corner from my house. Near to me, but far for him since he lived somewhere on the west side. He got badly lost on the way over, and called mid-way, and I really didn't know what to tell him...doesn't everyone have an app for that? So he got here late and I was starving. I just wanted to go eat. He came in though, and seemed to want to linger here. He pulled out a joint and offered it to me, and also a bottle of wine he'd carried in his large man-purse.
Now, let's be clear, I don't take any drugs, and I don't drink at all....but he wouldn't have known that. Even so I thought it was creepy and strange that he'd brought these things. He also had a folder with 2 sheets of paper, one for each of us, with a place for our signatures at the bottom. It was a contract about the STD's he had, some cured, some abated, and some still active. I was to read and sign this, both copies, to release him from liability should I catch any of these diseases from him.
I know you're think I'm making this up, but it's absolutely true. I was aghast. What could I say to this except to explain to him that he was jumping the gun, and couldn't we just go eat around the corner? So I got him out of my house and as we walked down the street he asked me if I was a lesbian. At this point nothing shocked me coming from him. We sat down and had a nice Thai curry, but of course I got a stomach ache and made this meal as brief as possible.
We got out and walked to his car, and he said 'I want to show you something'. I was thinking 'Is this going to be the decaying body of the last woman you dated?' He opened his trunk and showed me the change of clothes he'd brought to wear to work the next day in case he stayed over.
I just said 'Thank you for dinner.' and basically ran into my house and locked the door.
Fruity Curry Coconut Sauce
1 large tart apple (like Granny Smith)
1 banana
2 tablespoons apple juice concentrate
1 12 oz can coconut milk
1 tablespoon coconut extract
Juice of 1 lime
1 tablespoon canola oil
2 tablespoons madras curry powder
½ teaspoon cumin
½ teaspoon salt
This takes a bit of time and patience but it's worth it.
Start out by frying the dried spices in the oil in a heavy skillet, making sure to keep stirring the mixture lest it burn. You will know when to stop when you can smell the strong aroma of the spices. Set this pan aside.
In a heavy pot pour all the liquid ingredients except for the lime juice and set over a low flame. Peel and dice the apple and add. Cook this mixture until it reduces by half. Be sure to keep stirring. Peel and slice banana and add, stirring for about 10 minutes.